Regular love: its anything but
by KawaiiMordecaii
Summary: a new blue jay is in the parkl mnand mordecai is in love... but as usual, things happn that rent so ordenary.. soery i am not very food at typing :(
1. Chapter 1

Mordecai n rigy were doing there jobs. they were shovelin up tree trimos becase benso told them the wrok beson called them and saod "eveyone we have a new groundskepper her name is CHarlotte" she was a blue jay like morecai. she walked out downe the steps and saide introdused themselves and she liked especially mordecai and maybe thomas. heheheh. she had blue fethers and long pigtails (like miku!) and her hair was multicolourd. she wore a riped FIST PUMP tank top and a skirt. she wore a sock on une of her arms for some reson. nobody knew but the didn azsk because she coud get teg work seh went to ordecai. she said "hi mordecai how abot we get cofe"  
"sure i wil get rigby"  
so they webt to the coffree shop. at the coffee shop margert sade "hi mordecai riggy who is trhe girl you have" "oh she is my new friend Charlottle she isa new park groundskeepeer. Can we get some coffees!" "sure mordecai I will make an extre god one because she is new, in town." they sat at a comfy tablle. Riggy was watchin the tv but chqroltte and morecai taled. SUDDENLY A KILLEEERR CAME IN THROW THE WINDOW!


	2. Chapter 2

so the murderer BRUST in! thtoe the window! He grabed chralotte and said: "EVERYONE I WILL KILL OR RAP THIS NGIRL IF U DONTLET ME HIFDE IN HER!" everyone screemeedd! "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAEEEEEOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEIIIIIII!1!EEEEEEEEEEE!" CHARLOTTE SCREACHED BECAUSE SHE WAS SO SCAAAAAAARED! mORDECAI grabed the chair and threw it at the burgererl! he fell and charlotte could escape! she wentr up to mordecaisaid "omhfg thank u mordecei! wee ndeeed to call the police!" she cried! margeret came with coffee and her ohone! she called the police and said "hi thjere is a rober or murderer in here at coffee shop starbucks (i am callin it that) please take him away!" the police and they went home.


	3. Chapter 3

That night charlotte had no where to sleep so she went to sleep with mordecai in his bed he and she were fine about it. in her sleep she cudled up to mordecai and they bloud **BLUSHED! **the morning afyer she went downstares and cocked some pancaks. thhey came down and drooled because SHJE is a marster cooker. they served the brekfast and they eate them. they were DELEICOSE! mordecai shyly said "charloto will u go otu with me?" she gasped an said "yeah! of cous of cours!" rigbu laughed because it was fisilli. soafter wiork they webt toa fancy resturant. They got deleicous food. When hey walked home they stoped in front of the cofe shop! Mordecai kissed Charlotte! margarti saw them and cryed and drove homo! when they got home nobody was homo because benson had a dater with audrie and muscle man was goin out with muscle moma and hi five goste was probly somewhere idk and iggy was with heilen. skips was doing the spirit maraca dance he does (lol) at the forst. poops was visitin faily. so theyw ent upstairs and made out. charlotte keenly said "hey baby u wanna do it!" but mordecai said "thids is our first date so we jst kised. maybe next date?" so charlotte siged. he went to play video gays bit carlothe wasnt into video gams sdo she sat upstares and reed an book. suddenly she had an idea!1


	4. Chapter 4

she took of her clothes and lay on the bed sexily. she called out "MORDECAI HELP A RAT!" and he ran upstairs. he saw her and blushed so hard and he ram to her and toke off his close and they made put for a while. then he said "its time baby" and they

DIDIIDIDIIIIIII DID IT!

AFTER that just as they were liyen in bed rigby came upstairs with eilen and said "OMFG WT NAKED WE WRE GONA DO IT MORDECAI U RUNE MY LIFE!" and mordecai said sexily "just do it downstrars okay heeez." aso rigby abd eileen went downstairs and ditt dfiiitt so charltte cuddled up to him. he squzed her bob and he grabed his sword. they did it again. and nosebled!


	5. Chapter 5

One nite chaerlottle was in the bathroom for long. she wasnt pukig ir anything NO THEY DID NOT GET OREHGNENT. she was slittin her writs because her onluine friend said she hzted her. mordeycai opended the door and saw her sock on the flore with blood drippin on it from all her cuts on her harms! "why didnt u tell me! i cud have counforted u! thats what tge sock was! du u even trust me charlte! i hte u!"

charlote cried "no bab please i will twl u everyting! plz dont hate me!" so they sorted it out and made out. mordecai put bandfages on her arm and they thrww out the sock. when dey healed she got a rainbow fishnet and put it on her arm. they celebrated her not cuttin by going to FIST PIMPS!"! Concert.


	6. Chapter 6

on e day there was a festival at the park. charlote was doin the snack sand with rigy. se didbnt rreaky like tigby that much vecause he always complaned and never cid work rite. he was realu bord so he slespt at the sand. she got angrey an but didnt told bebnsob becuase mordecai wou;d get mad for gettin rigy in trpuble. mordecai came gto the sand. "he charlottw i need help u have thomas with u for bakup i need u to get de chairs." "ok mordecid" so dey got tomas to work at the sack sand wit rigy. she got the chairs wit mordecai an put tdem in fron of the stage. I FIST PUMPS was there playin so benson let them get off erly sp dey could watc the cdonert. at de concert dey herd em sing and cheered. but sudenly a GIANT SKELETON WIT WOLF TAILS AN WINGS AN HORNS CAME OUT OF THE STAGE! DEY THought it was part of the conecrt but everyone scremed so dey knew ir wouldnt. dey had to DEFETE de monster! it attaked charlote n she got traped in GOOO! ew. it was sticky. mordecai scremed "\CHARLOTTE i will HELP U!" N he cut de skeltons legs. tde skelton fell over n duied. as reward fist pims gave dem t shirts n money n bac kstage passes for EVERY concert and pics n autograps. Dey went bacstage wit dem n SMOKED WEED. after dey wer super hihg so de went homo n had sex (isnt dat a surpise lol) de nex mornin dey had a surpise...


	7. Chapter 7

charlote got a pregnecy dtest anmd she turbed out to be PREGNONT! OMG! She told morcdecio n he said "omfg how r we gunda taske car of it!" "idk we shode have used a congdom!" charlotw siad. so dey just wemt tp work to try put ot off. dudenly a GIANT MOBSTER CAKE OUT OF THE GROUND ZAND GRABED MORDECI! SHARLOTTE USED HER LAWNMOWER TO DESTROY IT! It was made out of gass. it almosty died but it zaped charlotte and her baby didespered! she scramed and destroyed the gas monmster! it died. so tnhend dey went to the starfucks. marget saw dem kissin and gasped! mordecai ahad a new gurlfrend! she said. eilene and rigy were talkin. Q"i dont trudst chafrlote she is supsisous and i tink her dadzs a demo" rigy said to eilen. "yeh i looked it up and-" but yhen A GIANT DEMON MAN BURTS THROUGH THE GROUND AND GRABED MOEDECAI AND SHOUTED "U R NOT WORDY 4 MY DOGTER! I WILL ET U!" "BNO DADa HE IS MY HOYFIREND!£ SHE SCER,ED! RIGY JUMPED IOBN HIS HEAD AND POLLED HIS HORN OFF! (IT WAS very brittel.) HIS BRAIN CAME OUT AND HE DIED! "omgh yey tanks for killin my dad rigy!" charlotte said. she juges rigy and he pushed here off "no i lovew eilen" he sadi so de went home and watced tv


	8. Chapter 8

One day riggbo was wit eilen n dey wer kissin under a tre. eilen sad "do u still tink charlotte is evli?" "yeah seh is specicious" rigy sad. mordcai walked by and stared at dem "y r u judgin charlote she is buetiful an u dont kno mayb she will save de park" "yeh but didnt u luv magret" rigy answerd "yeh but i lik charlote mor now we r gona go close shopin" mordecai said "u dont even wwere closes she is changin u onto aq gurl!" rigey saod. " is my gif! ure just jelos!" mordecai said an d theyu fought! a giant horse guy came out of the groun an daid "WAAHAHAHAHAHAAH I WILL DESTORU ALL DE FRENSHIPA!" sudenly rigy n mordecai knew det hat do wort defethber becaus he hald eielen an charlote in his hans! "we gptas save dem!" mordcai said! so dey got stiks n stuvkl em in his eyes! "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" it scremed n droped degrls n died. dey celebetaed by goibn to de club n HVIN A RAVE PARTY! lol omg dey got druk n went homa at lik 3 in dde morinin bebson got mad but dey didnt care lol


	9. Chapter 9

charlot an mrodeca wer walkin to teh saebuks tto get cofe. marget said "hi welcome i wil get de usul;" so dey sat diown. dey watch tv n marget gav dem de cofe. sudnely rigy cam. a grl eevee was folowin him. she had a lon pigtail n a tank top n shorts. "plz rigy b wigt me!" she said wit lust in herd eys,.; "no get away i hava girfdend!" he sad angerly. he got cofe n sad ton wit mordcai n chralote "dis eeve keps folowin me its anoyin! uhg!" sej sat down n said "rigbny! pls i luv u!" later wen doey wer workinm seh kept folowin dem. "go de fuk away i hat u!" rigbo said. "no cuz i luv u!" few datys kater eilen went missin. rigy was sad. he decided 2 dat de evee girl buz wy not? her nam was Blella. aftr a wile he orhot bout eilein hhhhg and dstarted likin bella. but un day rigy disaperd... Miordaic n CDharlote went to dlook for him. dey fpound him n bella. BUT BELLA WAS EVIL! she had real long hair an had rigy tide up in de hari. "mrodeci help!" he sad. a battle was guna havpen! mrodecai ran to her btut she cgrabed hin wit de har! "cgharlote help wik!" he scremeded so she puled on her dair! "AAAAAAAHGHGHGGHGH! she scremed "ILL NEVER GET TO HARVEST HSIS SWETE JUCES!" she screm,ed and melted. Eilen ran into rigy n dey huged. dey clebed by havin a movie nite.


	10. Chapter 10

(AN: I apologise for not posting in a while. I was a bit distracted and forgot about the story. But after remembering how amazing it was, I have decided to continue.)

mrodeci n cherlot wenjt to starbacks. dey got coffee as usul but hnmargret ws nit der. "where is margati?" sade chrolot, her eys all glitery n sad. "i tink she wet o colege." elein sad sadly. "its oky milein seh wile be bakc. " rigbuoy seid concrendly, his gaize makin eilen blushe. it wase lik an animu. rigeys eyes wer big n hansom. eilen was almot cryin n her eiys werrwe big n wet. she cride in2 rigbeys arms. "eien... i have a nouncment 2 make." he whispered. chrolota n mordeicai wer sippin cofofe obsvertanti. "eiken... wil u mary meh?" he said hansomely, his hair flistenin in de sunlite. evyone in de starbooks said "AAAAWWWWEEE!" "OH rigebey, tyess!" she gasped, cryin tears of hjoye. dey kissed. "Ew ged a room!" a radom ladie showtered. modeca n charlott left a smmug loke on der faeces. dey went bak 2 da prak.

"WERE WER U SLAKERS U HAB TO GET BABK TO WOK! DOTE MAID ME FEYER YOOO!" BEBson SHOUTED! "Calm da fook down bebsen iggy and helen r gettin maried he porpoised." "oh dats sweet u kno wats sweeter? GETTIN BAK TAH WOREK U GED FOR NETHIN SLATHERS!" dey shrubbed and raped de leafs. "so wat u tink der babes gona be coled?" mrodecai snewered. carlot curled her lip. " i tink meybey riley r jami?" she laffed. afta work dey got a meteblal sub asn traked to paps. "helo lovly feles! did u heer de news about rigba n eieleon?" he laped. "ya dey getin mared!" calot smoled. "int it ondoful?" popes sade cherfoliE. skips came. "u guys shudnt be so cherry bout it. mirage is a berry sacrid ting. u shud be ferry repecful 2 dem." he gronted. carlotte didn rely like skaps. he alway acked lik he wus improtent becuz he was like a hunded. "oh cher up skeps!" modecau saud. "i nede 2 fix somtin out in the outskirts." skops groled. "my fatha wants me 2 meet him 4 park bidnis." popes sad. "were gona go prank tamais! hes out walkin lol wat a losder!" muscle man said as hie fite goste high fived him n dey al lefte breefly. "okey we got de hose to herself lets DO IT!"!" Modecia shouted esitedly. dey jumed on de couch bn praxticaly RIPPED off all der clots! charlot bent down in fronta mordecais crote. "umm wat r u doiun?" he sad? i wana trie sumtin difrint" chalot said sedictiviely as she began 2 shroke mdecais cok. "oh dat feels gud!" he moned. afte a wile she stoke harder n harder n fasta untill he had enuf! "ooh" he shout as he came on hjer faic! she liked it al of. "now 4 part 2!" she hapuily said as she put her mote arond his beg hard dek. she suked so gud. "mmmmm! dat fells beter!" he mioned. he cam in her mout. "u tase good baiby" she moaned as she sliped a cogdom on his monsta croc n stradled on hin. he put his dek in her pusey n punpedd! "ahh u so good!" she yeled. dey orgsamed. afyer dat dey fel aslep. dey put a blanket over demsef so in cait anybudy waked in! after a wile dey bwoke up. nodody was hume yet so dey clened up der shex sceem n put on der glotes. modeai pleyed bideo gams n cherlto wated him. ater wile eberyun kame bak. rigey n eineen wer gain into ech udders eys. carlot wen t out 4 a wake. but after a wile she dill dint cum bak. "im guna luk 4 cerltr. " mordecai anounced n walkd ote de dor.


	11. Chapter 11

after mordaca foudn chartot dweywent2 bed.

mroirdercai n rigber wer puking up a new apple tee. dey wet 2 da flortits n got da tree. wen dey wer drivin bak a magica force stotped dem. "wtf i told u 2 get more gas!" riggbae saod. "omfg shut up u didiot!" modeic shouted. "mwahaahaha! I WILL TAKE DA TREE!" A wizard said. "huh?" the racon n the blo jai said,. sudenly dey feet weird. dey wer in eaacheyjers nodies! "omfg im a raccoon!" mordeca said. "omfg im a blue jayu!" rugby said. the wizard ried 2 take the tree but dey ran over him wit da car! dey drove 2 da park n asked skits wat 2 do. "im soryey guys but ders nutin i can 2 about dis! u'll have 2 wait 4 it 2 ware off!" skipps said angrily. dey interuppted him,."plz plz find a way!" "no u fulls i do not kno wat 2 do!" he yaled and ran off "wat we gon do?" rigy siasd "idk.. guess u gon hav 2 be me n i gon hav 2 be u" mordecai said. "eww no im engaged i aint gona fuk carlot!" rigy grossed. "u dont hav 2 u kno! we dontr skew dat much!" mordecai yeled. "um yeh u skew at least 5 a WEEK! Shiso horneyyyyy!" riggy laged. "humph!" mordecai gronted. dey went back. "hey modecau i got a suprse 4 u!" charlene saide sudectivy. "umm i need 2 dew work" rigy said uncomfotabley an ran outside. "is he alrite?" charloni aked mordeca.l "um yeah mrodeci forgote he had sum overtim 2 do." mordo dribled. "wait a sec u sound different!" charlat supsected. "umm" "hey r u switched bodies!?" charlotei graled. "umm yea a wizard did it by don now how 2 fix it." mardaci saighed. "i kno a witsard! i can helu u!" charloto said. dey got riggy n went to her frens hous. she was a red apaca. name skyulu. ~"oh ya i can fix it! just stan still!" she sade and foosh the magic! but den an eveile wizard came in an ataked in da midle of sa spell! "my fens are busy!" cherlo shouted. her eys glowed n she used her powe r 2 kill him! "wowww" dey said after da spell. "oh what?" carlot asked. "umm u got all glowy n killed him!" eigu said. "oh no my demon powa!" she cried. "wut itsa cool!" rigy sad. "ya but if it happens dat means da demons r gunna take ova me body!" chralot said. "oh we gota get da demons out!" mordo sad an dey asked her friend skyulu wat 2 do. "i do not know!" "plz skyulu! we gatta!" skyulu took out a book. "dis may hav da spel!" she flicked tyhrough th3e pages. but den a demon came outta sharlot...


	12. Chapter 12

a demone came outa sharlot! "omfg what da hell?" rigby shoted as charlotes body fell into mordecis armies. "im sorey.. is hud hav tolde u sonar...~" she choked ote as she pased ote. "dunt worey! we will fix dis!" mordocai cryed as he huged her. de demon jumped ouda de windo n trougj de stretes. "we gatta chase it!" skyulu said as dey got on her brom. dey flew afta it an it went 2 ileens house! "NOOO not ileen!" rigny yellowed as dey went into da hjouse. da demon sumoned tentacies n dey wer distrated. bie de tim dey defeeted de demon it was 2 late. eleens blude was everywer. ribby held her in his arms. "nooo! eleen stay wif me!1" rigo sade. "rigby... i luv...u..." eleen choked out as her eys roled up n her hart stoped. "EILEEEENN!" he shouted as he huged her 1 last tyme. "omfg... it was all my faut..." charlote sobed.. "it was not ur fallt charlat!" mordoci sade as dey huged eachider. a week lata deu had her funeral in de park. "it's my fault.. im sorrey ellen.." charlotte sputered lik a dying putt-putt. "dees tings hapen all da time... but its sop sad..." bebnsob said sadly as he cumforted dem. "FUK OFF BENSEN! U hav nutin 2 dew wit dis! u dont kno waqt itz lik!" mordoca yelkled. "i hav lost my luv... so man times..." bensen said a tear cumin 2 eyez. afta dat charlat n riggy were sooo depreszzed. but afta a wile dey got betta. it took tim but dey wer getin happier n rigey waz lukin 4 a new gf.

(AN: Okey pplz so now we r guna hav a vot! whu shud riggy date?! leev ur critizims in da revows n put whu u qwud lik riggy 2 dat!)


	13. Chapter 13

(okey so nubody votted on rigbys gf! so im guna ad some yaoi wit him an sumun. himophones fuk off! deis is a bisezual pride suportaz zone! or ill kall enoby to drink ur blud n stab u!)

rigby n mordocai wer sitin in da cofe shop. mordecai was werin a blaggy back t shit dat sed "ebony rox!" in red bludy lettas wit a pic of ebondy n draco frenchin. he waz werin skiny jeenz n a nintendo controla belt bukl. his haire was long n spikey n almust covrded is eyes. it waz spiky n had cyan tips n pink streeks. (AN: pink is nut gay if bois wer it wit blak! bvesids mordoci is visezual so ge wunt car if u cald im gay!) it jkinda luked like his hare wen he was blind but blak n wit coloures in it. rigby wuz drinkin his cofe sadly. sudenly da new waiter came up 2 him. (day hat 2 get new workers cuz maerget waz in colege n eukleen was ded.) "hai can i get u anytin?" da waitor sade. he wuz a wite weezel wit cute hair. his namtag said "shane" rogby wuz in luv, but den he shook out uv it. "im not gay!" his mind said but his hart said oderways. "umm ya jus a frappucino plz." be sauid blushin. he got da cofe an left wit mordecai. £dud wer u okay in der? u were al red wen da barisa came." mordo asked. "IT WAS NUITINN!" rogbo said insecurly. "u totly like him!" mordoecai said. rigbofe plushed. ova da next few weks riby got 2 kno shan. wun day he finely aked im out on a dat. it turned out dat da boss told shan to go 2 a fifferent table but shan saw rogby n went ova 2 him inted cuz he liked em. afta a date dey went ome. nobduy cuz home cus mordocai was at a blody pentagramz 6666 centcort wit charlpte (dats ebonyds band!) benson was takin a vacation n skips was building a new buldig wit popo at de oda end of da park. mussel man n hi fives were helpin a bro out. shan n rigby sat on da couch n played vidya games games. afta a wile shane stoped. "rigybay." he saed. "huh?" rigo ansered but befor he could sat abyting shan passively kist trigyu. dey moned in extaty n riped of echodars clots. rogby suked shans dik n shan did im in de but. dey wer so tied dey fel asleep.


	14. Chapter 14 da attak of da preppy homopho

h2rigbae and shano wer makin out in de park by da tres. Dey wer sahrin a metbaled subbe and drinkin from a cup wit 2 strows. dey wer so hapeh togeder and some yaoi fangurls were watcin, wat pervets lol. rigb was was werin a balk FIST PIMP tank n some jeens wit some vans. shan was werom a vest amd some shorts dat shoed off dat sexah bulge. sudenly a rok was trew at dem. "HEY who did dast?" shan sad all protective an like. riggy stood up to fite dem but got hit in da faic by a rok m passed out. da sam happened ato shan. a couple of howas late m,ordecaicaidecai was in da forst were deu were. "hey where did riggy n shan go?" he said den he saw a cult in de middle of da forest. he hid behin a tree and looked at the cult. dey has...RGGY N SHAN! No it was just 2 furies in fursuts.. wat a weirdo. dey wer praparin a ritool! da furies were tied 2 steaks n de preps were constumed in preppy clodes n had pieces of poo in bags 2 thro at dem and put in der cheru coke!¬! donut worry i will saiv u from dis ugly homophobic cult of prepz! mordecai shouted. den he got catured. he woke up in a dark dungeon similar 2 da dungon in somewer wit a dungeon. rigy n shan wer on da oder side. dey wer pased out. "mmwahahahzah we nut only kill faGS\ugly fags lik dem awe kill de n uglonmi goffs lick u!" a guy in preppy clothes sed. he was werin a hollister hoody n had black hare but not da kewl goffik kind da preppy kind. he was werin shorts which had pinupples on dem n ugly prep shoos. "if ull exuse me i nedz to write a 938534898453259328 page long essaqy about how da cristal gems r not gayyY!Y!Y!Y!Y!Y!Y!#" da prep boi sed n walked off throo da preppy dugong. mordocola looked around. der wer postaz of one duroction n justin baver n emininem on da wallz. da chainz wer decoratted wit molly cyrus stickerz n had molly cyrus liricas written on dem lik "i cam in lik a rekkin ball" amd "wr cant stop oh we wont stap" mprdaci was swettin. "NOOOO! MY PIOWAZ R DRAINED BY PREP STUFF!" he sceremed wich woke up rigly n sham. "omfg u so loud let us sleep DEIOFHUFHOMG WE R IN A PREPPY PRISON!" Rigglyjiggly gasped as teerz choked his mote. "dunt worreure babby we will get out sewm. shan said, his finger uo his rigy ass alredy.. "MORDOCAI GET OUT OF DA PIRSON WE R GUN HAVE BUNSEX" riggy screemed. no i ca\znt even get ouda deezx chainz u landlubber." mordocastrong yellowed angry./strongoh ya we r not afecced by da prep stickaz n da postaz n shit." shan said and spat starbucks suace on da chainz of da mordolionai. das chainz melted an mordo ran 2 fite da prepsz as de shan n da riggy had VERY LOUD buttsecks. "OMGGH WHO IS USIN DA BIG SCREEN 2 WATCH GAI PORN AGEN NOT A VERY FUNNI PRANK"! a prep dsed. he was werin a gucci shit n some prepy jeenz. mordoca\i snapped his nek. he used his fukin goff powaz to use his giant dixzzzz to smash evry pep in da hole place into da wall n dye. he rescood shan n riggy n dey wer aboot 2 leev wen duddenly a boi stoped shan. it was a preppy skunk. "omfg who r u?" riggy sed. "i am... HIZ X!" da skunk yelled. "omg not u leeslu I thot we wer ova!" shan yalled. "2 bad! i am gunna kill u for brekkin my hart n killin me." dey fogt but in da end riggy waz romanced bay da skunk n dey killed shan. lesley n rigbacai fprever!/h2 


End file.
